This week is my last at work. On August 13, I told my boss that I was leaving, and I told him why. It wasn't that I didn't like the team, or the challenges, or the company. It's the type of work we do that I don't like and unfortunately, that's really hard to change unless you move on to another position in another company. I don't have another position in mind yet, even less another company, but I knew it was time to leave. So I did.
Don't get me wrong. I work with good people. But I also work with workaholics. Nothing wrong with being a dedicated worker if you are passionate about what you are doing. I wasn't. There is no half measure in my line of work, you either love it, or you don't. I didn't. I didn't like that we did all this research, thinking, analyzing, interviewing, and reporting only to leave at what I consider the most critical time: execution. I realized that I am an action-oriented woman. Give me a task, and I'll get it done. When my task is to make recommendations that I will never see being implemented (because we leave the client with this part of the task), I feel very detached from my work. It's too abstract, too theoretical.
I also didn't like the short-term relationships we developed with clients. Part of helping a team or a company realize something is to understand their culture and the rich web of relationships that exist between people. When you work with a clients for a few months, and most of the time from a distance, you cannot understand culture. Or maybe others can, but not me. I'd like to have a more personal relationship with the people I work with, be it clients or coworkers. But that wasn't possible in my line of work.
There were other reasons for deciding to leave, but these were the main ones. And one week before my last day, I feel that more than ever, I've made the right decision. I also took the time to sit down with each of my colleagues to explain to them why I was leaving. I work with smart, exceptional folks and I don't want to leave in bad terms, with lots of questions hanging about my motives.
Today, I updated my status in Facebook to let friends and family know what I had decided to do. I was really surprised by the show of support and the well-wishing tone of the comments overall. Not that I doubt the support of my friends, but at the same time I was wondering if anyone would ask why, wonder about my sanity for doing this. Nobody did.
Last week. Doesn't feel different. It will next Monday...